On my question list for Jesus has always been why mosquitos? Our chocolate hacienda tour guide told us today that there is no chocolate without them. They carry the pollen in their feet and pollinate the cacao flower. Our guide’s name is … Jesus! Cross that off the list!

Our last clinic day. Always bittersweet.

Kelly’s devotion this morning strengthens my own of yesterday. Yahweh Jireh=the Lord will see to it. He asks me to trust His timing. He asks me to be willing to obey. He encourages me to be attentive to His provisions. He does not ask me to figure everything out and assure follow through and completion; those are His jobs. This frees me to be present with each person He brings before me knowing that He will see to the rest.

I watch the pink, blue, green, orange, turquoise and yellow homes with their tree trunk fences fly past my bus window. There are no two the same.

Along the river’s edge, I find lily pad lawns from dried up flooding; The dense tropical growth of the mango, avocado and  white fluffball palm trees are interspersed with the evergreens and alternate with the wide open many colored grass fields: wild, red grasses in the center of tall, maroon, brown and yellow fern stalks. They sway in the wind changing colors with the movement.

I am greeted my the familiar face of my new friend. Gilhenia is what I hear but my triplets, Katya, Karen and Karina Jimenez Leon, write her name as Virginia. She may be short in stature but she is big in personality and grand in smile.  She is full of questions I don’t understand even after I say Hablo espanol poquito… I use all my codes to why don’t you have internet? Did you resign try to convey I haven’t a clue and finally I shrug my shoulders. When she still persists, we walk up the path hand in hand to seek a code talker/interpreter. It turns out I am an examiner after all. What I anticipated was a short chat became a complicated history taking reassurance-giving Convo. Yes, Virginia, you are just fine. 

I know some Spanish and French and Creole, Navajo, Swahili but I have trouble accessing the language placed before me. As a result, I am slow to even say ‘Hola’ or ‘Gracias’ because I am filtering through several other languages. I feel so foolish yet at the same time it makes me imagine heaven.There, I’ll be able to speak whatever language comes out of my mouth and it  will be understood! And, yes Anne, it will be so fine.

Santiago is back and becomes our constant companion again. His shirt reads “Spread your own ideas” and I add: not disease. It becomes our pseudo motto in nutrition.

By day’s end, he will have landed 90 botella flips. We count together and cheer with every one. Joe joins us in the 20’s and soon catches up as the competition heats up. 

Daniella Marcella, who is 4ish, joins us with her unquenchable fire. She begins with cautious watching but commits her whole small self when I offer her a botella of her own. She literally spends every subsequent minute all morning working her skill and mimicking my excitement with each successful landing. I marvel at her persistence and joy.

Early in the day. Virginia’s husband Hector comes to me just as Abraham, a seminary student and one of our interpreters, walks past. I snag Abraham so that he can tell me what Hector needs. It seems that Hector saw one of our examiners yesterday just as Virginia had but Hector had forgotten to mention his sore arm. It seems that Hector had injured his arm sometime in the past and it has continued to hurt every day until now. I assessed it and found a monstrously tight knot, much like those I have on my back which I once named after my oldest boys,  David and Peter. It just so happens that we have a skilled medical student on the team and she has mad skills with relieving muscle pain.  I asked her to fit Hector in.  She was very busy all day but right at the end of our day, I brought long-suffering Hector to her and after only  a few minutes, the knot was released and Virginia was taught how to intervene in the future. Hector was so pleased he found me to tell me, in rapid, excited Spanish, how grateful he was. It was a sweet way to end our clinic time in Mexico.

Strength for today (bright hope for tomorrow): Strategic. I have been made with a distinct way of thinking; a special perspective on the world. An ability to sort through the clutter to find the best route. This is my strategy.  I sort through the events of my day with the strategic goal of seeing God’s hand and His perspective on my life.      

My heart  begins to sing. It takes me a moment but I recognize it:

Firm Foundation

“Christ is my firm foundation,
The Rock on which I stand,
when everything around me is shaken,
I’ve never been more glad
that I put my faith in jesus
because he’s never let me down.
He’s faithful through generations
so why would he fail now?
He won’t!”

I sent this song to Ari, pre-trip, to soften the voices of the naysayers in her life. I guess it has become the anthem of our trip.

We drive our two hours and return to our church from yesterday. 

I’m sitting in my family room again, as I did yesterday. My same family members haunt the hallways in the forms of my Mexican amigos. I am no longer invisible as they recognize me with grand smiles and endearing Buenos Dias. Benny is a thirty something handsome man wearing his signature red baseball hat and I learn his name today. His smile is outrageously sparkling and he welcomes me back with a vigorous handshake. It is later that I realize he reminds me of Philip.

This church family is lovely to watch as they care for one another. There are hugs and slaps on the back for everyone including myself.

Joe and I run our station like a well oiled machine. I welcome every patient with a smile and a blood pressure and he takes over from there. I am a bit surprised to realize that I am actually missing doing exams. When I began the trip, I felt so inadequate but as is so often the case, God calls me to be willing and when I say yes, in spite of my fear, I rarely have to do the thing I dread. Today, He has replaced dread with longing and that makes me kind of laugh. He knew, as Kelly did, that I have nothing to fear when God is doing the equipping.

Mi amigos, Santiago and Susanna, have returned today and they eagerly transfer over to mi loco nino, Joe. Water bottle flipping challenges go on all day. 

There are a set of teenage triplets running registration. Two of the three do the paperwork and one organizes the line. I’ve noticed the two paperwork doers fold the papers in opposite directions. I find that fascinating. When they ran out of forms, they each had a different idea about how to get me to understand this. One ran off to retrieve an actual form, one spoke rapid Spanish detailing the need and the third folded an imaginary paper in the air and put it in a bag. The last one beat the runner and we retrieved some more forms.

Our local, lovely gatekeeper of the door to clinic, Socorro, laughs and smiles at me every time I enter. She catches me savoring a moment in front of an electric fan and giggles. It becomes our thing to watch each other and it is a highlight of my day.

I felt a bit isolated from the team in our down the path locale, but somehow closer to this church community who seem to have made me a part of them. The cook took my face in her hands and kissed my cheeks saying something about manana.  Yes, indeed, until manana!

BHWB, MexicAnne

I awake to a lower energy day and to combat this, I wash our three pairs of scrubs in the sink, ringing them in a towel, and hanging them every which way to dry. I eat my instant oatmeal while sitting by the hotel window looking out at the bright day and I explore my Input strength.

“Those with strong input talents are inquisitive. They love to provide relevant and tangible help to others.”

I smile at this. I stayed up late writing last night. I’ve found that I have a need to process my day through words as I seek relevant and tangible help for myself from above and then seek to pass on what I discover.

It may be a low energy day but it was for a satisfying reason and this will ultimately fuel my new day.

We are going to a different church. It is by a river in the lush countryside. Joe is staying back at the hotel so it is Ari, the team, and I, who head out for our 2 hour drive.

The countryside is a kaleidoscope of tropical yellow and green. The tall grasses wave gently in the wind. It is a cross between watery Bangladesh and the savannahs of Africa, only with better roads. It is perhaps just as narrow, however, as I am startled out of my revelry by the occasional crash on the bus roof as we snap off an overhanging tree branch.

Our church is in a remote, rural town on the western river bank of the second largest river in Mexico. We walk a leisurely dirt path past a mud pond of ducks and chickens. The birds are singing in the trees that canopy our way and we enter the church from behind. The ‘front’ of the church faces the river.

We set up clinic in a partially finished cement building with uneven, loose dirt floors.  I am in charge of Joe’s station today and so I set up the height and weight. When I step on the scale, I am pleased to see that I have lost 50 pounds in the last two days! Wow! I must have really been sweating.  After a few failed tricks, I move my station to the cement floored church buildings farther away so that I can gain my 50 pounds back😉.

My first patient, 80 yo Susanna, sees that I am heat challenged, already, and offers me her spare hand fan. We bat our eyes at each other over our fans and laugh. Just two little maids from school, I sing.

Magania is my line helper and though we do not share common words we do share a common language of service. Her broad smile melts me each time I look up.

In between my patients, I feel like I’ve entered a zone of invisibility. It’s as if  I am transported back in time. The church people are greeting each other warmly. Smiles and laughter float above the conversations.  It feels like Old Timers day in rural New Mexico and Philip is everywhere. These are his favorite people, speaking his beloved language,making his best loved foods, and wearing his cherished white straw cowboy hats. Over by the kitchen, I see Philip’s Uncle Pat with his thin, long face and big, bullshit protected ears that peek out from under his 10 gallon.  Grandpa Sam with his round face and beautiful bald head comes walking in unsteadily, with his love in one hand and a cane in the other. Philip’s friend Rosario’s twin is here with his contagious smile and laugh. It is a bittersweet zone and I am partially grateful for the quick escape back into work.

Each time I weigh a young man, an older man peeks over my shoulder to see how much the scales says and then makes a few comments in Spanish. I wonder at this but with no interpreter I am left to my own musings. I try to relate that the scale is in pounds and not kilograms but I don’t think I am successful. Later, I suspect that he might have been converting pounds to kg for them and I marvel at his mental math skills. In this heat, my math skills are not at their finest.

In the afternoon, I find myself surrounded by my  four amigos:  Susanna, Ingrid, Santiago, Issac. They swarm to my side between patients and are shooed away by my math wizard when a new one comes. They teach me Spanish numbers and ABC’s in between.

I begin to flip my water bottle to make it stand and they watch tentatively from the sidelines until my nefarious plan works and they swoop in to join me. The laughter and competition heats up and I make a few furtive glances at the adults to see if we are getting too loud but find instead that not one adult is looking our way. To me, it sounds like a riot in the making but no one seems to even notice.

I love greeting every patient, shaking the hands of the elderly, holding the babies, wooing the under five crowd, playing with the olders. This is my favorite kind of day.

BHWB,

MexicAnne

Today, my mind is filled with concerns. My body aches. The heat is so oppressive. Will I be up to my tasks today? As my mind turns to ask God these things, He directs me to my strength book. I open to Developer. It tells me my strength lies in finding the good in others; in seeking out roles in which my primary role is to facilitate growth.

In reading, my gut response is one of denial; “That does not sound like me”, I tell myself. Yet when I look at my day yesterday, it is exactly me. Despite my deficits, I was leaning into my God given strength. I was watching for and facilitating the growth of others.  The Developer strength continues with the affirmation: do what you can do rather than what you can’t.

As always, God changes my perspective when I turn to Him.

I’m ready. Clinic day #2 here we go!

Dennis’ devotion on the bus ride encourages us to consider making prayer our first impulse when faced with the challenges of our day. A wireless connection, if you will and connection becomes my theme for the day.

We return to the same church. The heat factor is less though our thermometers still groan. They stopped entirely yesterday mirroring our own stamina issues.

I look over to Joe who is wooing his 2yo patient. The little boy is not interested in having Joe measure his upper arm circumference until Joe shows him his own muscles. The little one then mimics Joe with delight at comparing strength, a broad smile transforming his face. It is a perfect tactic and with connection made, the measurement is done.

Later, several high school boys, Joe’s contemporaries, come to clinic. As they wait on the bench to have weight and height taken, Joe takes the opportunity for a small prank that transcends their language barrier. While one is having his height measured, which takes a blink, Joe stands behind him and puts his finger to his lips, signaling the benched ones to stay quiet. When his patient asks if he is done, Joe directs him to stand still and waits to see what the boy will do. When the boy realizes he’s being pranked, they all laugh together. Connection made. Deed done with delight.

When I look over at Ari, I see that her interpreter is 8yo Adele with her mother. I marvel as I watch Ari take the reins of her station and teach what she has just learned to Adele. She teaches with ease and confident tenderness. It is hard to believe we have only been here two days. She is so self assured and comfortable with her work as if she is equally as well practiced.

Genuine faith has a habit of playing dominoes. One Domino informs the next which informs the next until there is a cascading faith reaction. Take clinic, for example.

Dennis encouraged the team today to respond with prayer as our first impulse. Domino #1a. Laura walked to a high school yesterday to offer the clinic to the students. Domino#1. Today the students came. Domino#2. One of those students came to CSI in great physical and emotional distress where he found willing hearts to carry his burdens and others to listen to God’s call to pray. Domino #3 and #4. With the help of our community of Domino/believers, our young man, accepting our care also accepted our Savior, Jesus. He left with his understanding parents several hours later. Holistically cared for, given physical and emotional acceptance, he was open  to spiritual acceptance as well.  He left with a calm spirit and our Living Hope.

The Lord gave victory to His anointed, CSI dominos. He delivered this needy one and He answered us all from His heavenly sanctuary with the victorious power of His right hand, our Lord Jesus.

Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God and though our boy was  brought to his knees, he did rise up to stand firm and able to become a Domino in his own right.

It is the marvelous, beautiful circle of giving put in place by God Himself:

John 3:16

For God so loved the world that He gave…

Prayer for our sobbing CSI child

Psalm 20:1-2,5-8

[1]May the Lord answer you when you are in distress;
    may the name of the God of Jacob protect you.
[2]May he send you help from this sanctuary in Chiapas, Mexico
    and grant you support from Zion.
[6]Now this I know:
    The Lord gives victory to his anointed warriors in CSI
He answers them from his heavenly sanctuary
    with the victorious power of his right hand, our Lord Jesus Christ.
[7]Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
    but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.
[8]They are brought to their knees and fall,
    but we rise up and stand firm.

Psalms 51:10,12

[10]Create in us a pure heart, O God,
    and renew a steadfast spirit within us.
[12]Restore to us the joy of your salvation
    and grant us a willing spirit, to sustain us.

Psalm 72:12-14

[12]For he will deliver the needy who cry out,
    the afflicted who have no one to help.
[13]He will take pity on the weak and the needy
    and save the needy from death.
[14]He will rescue them from oppression and violence,
    for precious is their blood in his sight.

1 Peter 1:3-4

[3]Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,
[4]and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you,

It was a good day at clinic!

BHWB,

MexicAnne

There is a bus stop outside my hotel window. A constant parade of gospel colored vans stream past picking up, dropping off in a constant rhythm of the morning. 

This prompts me to look actively for how God’s rhythms are moving. I give thanks for each of the essential names He will have me speak today. My season of first reluctance is gone and my heart begins to sing:  “My chains are gone. I’ve been set free. Amazing Grace. How sweet the sound.”

It is a ragamuffin day as the sun rises creating shadows on the pavement. The familiar, acrid smell of burning garbage floats on the soft, heat tinged wind and already the bus is a welcomed retreat.

We begin  at the IGLESIA PRESBITERIANA MANANTIAL DE VIDA in El Paramisa, Chiapas, an hour drive from Villahermosa.

We set up clinic in the modest church sanctuary with spiritual counseling on the porch outside.

It is tight quarters but it flows well for the most part.

Clinic begins with Joe who eagerly sets up his post which begins with height and weight. He needs no prompting but goes right to work returning to the rhythms he began in Zanzibar last September. He is alive with positivity and it fuels his whole day and mine as well.

I begin in vitamins with Ari, teaching her its details. Irene, a medical student local, is her interpreter. They are both patient and helpful and kind and are running the station in no time. Ari proves herself to be a resilient, self assured, independent young woman. She is a delight and multiple team members tell her, and me. 

We are in full swing when an elderly woman arrives with her friend. She is faint and weak with a history of seizures. We start an IV and begin hydration. It is a hot, high humidity day so it is not so surprising that a seizure patient’s delicate balance might be disrupted. It is surprising that it doesn’t happen more often. The IV does its job and she walks out on her own power a few hours later.

Our hosts prepare a lovely lunch of potatoes, carrots and beef. They are very attentive to our every need. Cold bottled water and towels are generously provided accompanied by abundant patience with my poquito language skills. They are as pleased with our service as we are with theirs.

And though 105° with 90% humidity is taxing my limits, I take refuge in the beauty in the room as the locals and the US team seem to meld seamlessly together, giving from the gifts each has been given in the beautiful rhythm of God’s provision.

MexicAnne

June 19, 2023

Saturday, June 17, 2023
And so off we go to Southern Mexico with Developing Workers. I take my son, Joe and granddaughter, Ari with me this time. They have been exceptional traveling companions as we share each 3 seated row, taking turns at the window seat. It has been A’s goal to avoid the airplane bathroom. I smile to myself and say a prayer of thanks that squatty potties will not be included in this trip.
Mexico City airport presented our first eating challenge but Starbucks came to our rescue and was followed by a luggage riding race down the ramps.
We arrived in Villahermosa after a long day of travel. It is humid and breezy in the night air as we emerge from our third airport of the day. My glasses fog over as I leave the a/c and take a deep breath of our first fresh air.

Sunday, June 18, 2023
This trip I’ve been particularly aware of my inadequacies. After all my traveling, now, somehow, has found me reluctant to trust my assessment skills just as it was at the very beginning. My role as examiner and the responsibility it carries with it, has produced a renewed dread in me. As I’ve sat with this and acknowledged my fear, I’ve been gifted with a newly renewed confidence. “God does not call the equipped, He equips the called.”

This morning I’m reading a book about my giftings. In the language of the Clifton’s Strength Finder, my strongest gift is what they call connectedness. Today, it reads: “Connectedness talents can help you look past the outer shell of a person. You can naturally look past the labels and focus on his or her essential needs.” My phone autocorrects to “essential name”. How marvelous to consider that I am here not to treat disease but to treat people who’s essential name, as with my own, needs to be recognized and spoken.
I can only do this through Christ Who strengthens me as He calls me. And He calls me at the very point of my need.

Sunday service is in town at the Cristo la Luz del Mundo, Presbyterian Church. The sanctuary is large and we sit on the far left. They welcome and introduce each of us by name and we stand and wave hola.
They are celebrating Father’s Day and there is a Father’s Day choir made up of bright, white-shirted children. They sing songs in Spanish as I sing along in English. Some of the little girls tear up during the father tribute song. One daddy comes down front to hug his darling. It is a tender, beautiful sight.
Our teammate, Dennis delivers the sermon through a young interpreter. He uses the image of pushing his son on a swing: During times of trouble, like a swing, we sometimes feel like God pushes us away but when we return we will see that He has worked all things for our good. He works through and against the natural world to teach us how much He loves us. I Peter 1:3-7, Romans 8:26-30.

And He will work through and against our natural world this week. It makes me smile to watch expectantly for how He will speak my essential name this week.

MexicAnne

June 17-25, 2023

“But unto you that fear My name
shall the Sun of Righteousness arise
with healing in His wings;” Malachi 4:3

Two cranes perched on the bank of the stream; one brilliant white in the sun and the other a shadowy gray beside. The gurgling of the water is soothing to my soul. It’s sparkling reflection calling my name.
Here I am, standing at the bank of the river of time wondering where the waters will take me when I step back into the current.

And just like that, a hint of the answer takes flight before me. The soft breezing of the wind lifts the white bird’s majestic wing span as she flies above the water, her shadowy counterpart silently following in unison of being. Emerging beauty, shadow and brilliance, taking flight as one.

BHWB,
Anne
March, 2023

In response to my life, I grind my teeth, alot. This has damaged my jaw which has caused me to seek treatment. The treatment works really well. Yay! The trouble is the treatment is ridiculously painful. It pushes me to the very edge of my endurance; all semblance of power, competence, strength vanish in an instant. I am left quivering, exposed, intensely raw, completely defenseless, uncovered and bewildered.

I used to wonder why I didn’t cry out to God in those moments until I realized that it is then that my faith does it’s work.

Unbidden by me, my God gathers me under His wings  and covers me until the danger passes.

It would be easy to say that He “comes” to my rescue but that is not entirely true. He doesn’t need to ‘come’ to my aid or ‘show up’ for me because He never leaves my side even for a moment. The truth is He’s already there keeping His promises.

And that, my friend, is the assurance of faith.