I am up and ready for sunrise but decide to just lay down and wait for my sunrise buddies…and then it is breakfast and I have missed it. I am slow today, muted like the dusty landscape.
We return again to our middle of somewhere clinic. Yesterday, clinic saw a mom with four daughters, five months to five years old. All of them with pneumonia, fever and severe malnutrition. We brought them to the hospital but we’re not pleased with the care given so we brought them home today. I am tasked with making sense of the many medicines they needed. I had no paperwork, no names, no doses. My slow state of being made this more challenging than I would have liked. It was complicated by being interrupted to take care of other things. When all was said and done, it wasn’t. Mom found me to ask about the baby’s IV. I was so focused on the tasks I was given, I failed to question the IV. This led to a dose of IV antibiotic and another delay but afforded us the opportunity to reassess the sisters and give another dose of Tylenol. They will return tomorrow and Friday.
In the middle of the above, my girlfriend from Monday returns. Her heart rate and fever are still high and she needs a new IV. Monday she was so sick that she allowed me to start her IV without a struggle. She has more energy today and she is full of resistance. This is a good sign for her but a complexity for me. I make three attempts but her pulling away hinders each one. Kelly tells me she can get the local nurse to try. I met Erasco several trips ago and his nursing skills did not impress me. I was reluctant to allow him to try until I realized I was really afraid that he might succeed where I did not. Confronted with my own arrogance, I gave it up to God and invited Erasco in. He did not succeed but it was an arrogance busting gift nonetheless. I give the medicine by shot.
Another darling, about three years old, comes in with the same rampant fever and pneumonia. Mom reported that she was still breastfeeding because there was no food to give her. While she waited for vitamins with her mom, she became suddenly unresponsive. After several sternal rubs, she awoke and resumed her crying and irritability, resisting all care. It was decided she needed an IV with antibiotics. I was hesitant to take her on because of my recent debacle but I got over myself, again, and proceeded. The IV went in efficiently and being easily consolable now, she slept in her Mama’s arms for the antibiotic. She will return tomorrow.
As the last patient left today, I waved and found myself saying goodbye in Navajo. She didn’t mind. She just smiled and waved back and it made me smile too, partly at my ridiculous self.
My fatigue has made this a day of complex emotions and challenges. I’ve wanted to cry on more than one occasion but despite myself, I know we are needed here. Some of our patients would not have survived the week without treatment. When my efforts don’t seem to be enough, I can trust that His purposes will always trump mine. Thank God!
TanziAnne
July, 2026
Tripping with God: Stories of Faith and Inspiration 